The Change Part-3

this is the concluding part of this series. hope you all like them :)

please comment your thoughts on the story :)

love,

Gauri Narayanan

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The clock in the wall struck four times. I had just then completed giving the final touches to the nail paint on my toes and smiled at my handiwork. It was high time that I started getting ready and wait for Gauri. I went to bathe and then after half an hour came out wearing the towel over my chest and my hair in a tight bun under the cap. Opening the wardrobe, I chose to wear satin lingerie and a pink Patiala suit for the evening. Once I had worn the lingerie and set the breast-forms to look natural, I wore the clothes and then started applying make-up.

A year had passed since I signed my life away and became Gauri’s property. At first it had seemed like my life was doomed and that living had lost its worth. I had even attempted suicide not having been able to withstand torture at her hands, and had been saved by a furious Gauri, who then proceeded to give me the worst punishment till date. But gradually, as I gave in to her demands more and more, I started losing the will to even resist and by the time, I had been her slave for a couple of months, I began to enjoy being what Gauri had turned me into.

During this whole time, she kept me isolated from the whole world. In fact, even when I had failed at my suicide attempt, I was not rushed to a hospital and was brought back to health by her at home. She didn’t trust me with that and I couldn’t do anything. If I even stepped out of the house without her permission, I would get inflicted with pain. Anyways, life slowly took a turn when I started to enjoy these house chores. I learnt to cook well and then once I had perfected it, I started trying out new dishes to please Gauri.

Gauri never used to appreciate me and that actually became a motivation for me. To somehow get her to appreciate me for my hard work, became my dream and I strived to do it every waking hour of my life from then onwards. I would always keep the house clean, wash the dishes, indulge in cooking new dishes and then when finally everything was done, I would go and tend to Gauri and make her feel comfortable.

My days started at 5 in the morning, when I had to collect the milk from the doorstep and then start preparing breakfast and lunch. I would wake up Gauri with coffee at 7 and then she would drag me to the bathroom where she would urinate in my mouth and then make me drink it all. Then she would take a dump while I massage her hair with oil and then we both would take a bath in the bath tub, where she would make me lick her pussy and suckle her breasts till she orgasmed and then would let me scrub her and soap her up and then soap me up and harass me sexually and then we would rinse it off and go to get dressed. During working days she usually wore either a saree or an office suit. She would take my help in dressing up and making her face up and then she would dress me up, depending on her mood and then watch me practice my make-up skills on myself. Then while she read the newspaper, I would feed her breakfast and then pack her lunch and send her off to the office and then eat my breakfast.

I was ordered by her to eat only two meals a day and nothing in between, so as to reduce weight to a level that she found acceptable. At first, it used to be very difficult, but as time went by, my body adjusted and I started losing weight and size. I was also instructed to take a few tablets daily, and over a period of three months, I noticed that hair growth became sparse, hunger reduced and I even lost my beloved biceps and abs and became rather weak of frame. That was when she told me to stop taking those pills. My hair had also started growing below my neck and she ordered me to learn how to take care of it and maintain it and grow it till she liked.

And yes, coming back to my daily routine, I used to finish washing clothes, doing the ironing, cleaning the kitchen and other rooms and then if I had time to spare, spending time on the internet, trying to learn stuff such as knitting, stitching, international cuisines, make-up techniques, etc., and then practicing them. And then by four, I would start preparing dinner and getting myself ready for her arrival. She usually came back at 6 and I would welcome her with a smile and wait for her to inspect me in my evening wear. Gauri would then attack my lips for some time and when she got sated she would plop down on the sofa. I would then give her the evening coffee and then respond to her needs.

Then dinner would be served at 8 and again she would make me feed her, while she busied herself with something or the other. After eating dinner myself, I would clean up the kitchen and then if she felt like it, I would be given punishments for no apparent reason, and then she would ask me to lick her pussy and then when that was done, I would be ordered to go and sleep in my room.

The weekends were almost the same, except that there was more sex and less work. She would ask me to make a list of stuff that needed to be bought and then go grocery shopping on Saturdays. Apart from that she never felt the need to go out or let me out.

And then, a few months later, my dream came true. I had prepared a scrumptious meal for dinner and for the first time, she smiled at me and told me that the food was good. Hearing that, I became so happy and there were tears of joy in my eyes. Seeing that, she asked what happened, and when I told about it, she hugged me and told me that I finally seemed to have learned my lesson and that she was happy with what I had become. That night, for the first time, my penis was let out of chastity, after ten whole months, and I was allowed to please myself in the toilet while she watched. But try as I might, I couldn’t make it get aroused and finally frustrated, I cried of having lost my manhood entirely. Then Gauri came to me and started groping me and dominating me in ways that made me surrender, and then, to my surprise, I got aroused and ejaculated. She laughed and told me that I definitely had changed beyond recognition. This whole thing was making her more and more happy for some unknown reason. Then I was locked up in chastity again and ordered to please her.

But this time, I noticed something different in the way she handled me. Usually she would be very aloof and order me around but tonight, it looked almost as if she cared for me and she went slightly soft on me.

After that night, things started changing fast in our household. I started looking after the house with more fervor and worked day and night to keep Gauri happy always. And I soon realized that I had fallen in love with my captor and that I wanted to be hers all my life. Even if it meant that I never meet another soul ever and remained captive in this house forever. My attitude changed and I started cooking with love more so than with skills and that reflected in the taste. Gauri started appreciating me for what I did and even started bringing gifts for me. She had also started treating me as a woman rather than as a slave maid and started sharing memories from her past and we started having merry moments.

And then yesterday, out of the blue, she had told me that she felt it was time, that I met the world once again and that we were going out for dinner today. She had not told anything else, except that she wanted me to look my best and had asked me to wear anything I pleased from her wardrobe. And so, after having worn it, I sat in the dresser looking at the mirror, slowly brushed out my long hair, parting it into three bunches so that they can be braided. I then made a French braid and then added clips to finish it up.

Then, at six, the car pulled up and Gauri came in and smiled at me and took me in her arms and kissed me lovingly, saying that I was looking gorgeous. Something in me flipped and I told her that I loved her.

“Later darling, later. Now I have to get ready and we have an appointment to keep” she smiled and hurried into the bathroom. I was hurt that she didn’t respond to my professing love to her but at the same time was surprised to be called as darling by her for the first time. With my mind, as confused as ever, I entered the bath and got her washed up and then we went to the bedroom where she dressed herself up in jeans and blouse and let her hair loose and wore six inch heels and no make-up. I had never seen her dress up this way and was standing there with my mouth open when she smacked my ass and then grabbed my arm and led me to the car.

It was the first time I had stepped out of the compound and I was nervous about my appearance. Although I knew that unless someone looked under my panties I would not be caught, I still felt queasy. Gauri drove the car through the traffic and I noticed that she was deliberately going slowly, so that she could feel up my thighs and steel kisses at me. I got too distracted by her antics and didn’t realize where we were going to, till she pulled up the car and asked me to get down.

It was my house. I was stunned and pleaded with Gauri to take me back home and that I didn’t want to go into my house. She just dragged me inside, paying no heed whatsoever to my cries. Having lost all my strength and will to resist, I finally accepted defeat and walked up the stairs with my head bent low and face burning red.

“Chill Swathi, they don’t know it is you. I just told them that I have a matter of importance to discuss and that I would be bringing a girlfriend to dinner. And since your sister works for me now, she thinks it is a formal dinner. Plus I never told them what I have done with you. So it is going to be a surprise for them when I do tell them about you over dinner. Just keep your calm till then.” Saying this, she rang the bell.

My sister Smitha, dressed in a salwar rather formally, opened the door and welcomed us both in. Not wanting to be identified as to who I am, before Gauri actually told them, I decided to play along and spoke casually and in a feminine voice that I had practiced and perfected in the last few months. My mother then came out from the kitchen and served tea for both of us and told us to get cozy, as dinner would be ready in some time. Gauri introduced me as her friend from college who had come for a visit and then started talking about work with my sister, while I sipped the tea and observed the house. A lot seemed to have changed in the past one year and by the looks of it, my sister was doing really well at the job and was filling the house with costly and elegant stuff. And then we were called to dinner.

The table was set and all four of us started eating when all of a sudden Gauri started talking about me.

“You know Smitha, I have been meaning to ask. You have worked under me for a year now and yet you never ask about what happened to your brother after he tried to assault me at my house.”

“Actually Gauri, we do want to know what happened to him, but Smitha here, isn’t fond of her big brother and his chauvinistic attitude. So she avoids talking about him even with me. I have asked her so many times to ask you of his whereabouts. When you came here about a year ago and told me that you had gotten a written confession from him and that you had decided to send him off to some unknown place till he learnt his lesson and then bring him back, I got worried. But I knew that you could be trusted to keep your word, so I kept my silence. But Smitha never bothered to pass my messages to you.” Said my mother while looking genuinely concerned.

“Well your son didn’t exactly treat me as a human being. Nor did he ever listen to anything that I had got to say. If there is anything that I actually remember about him, it is the force with which he beat me up and swore at me for his own blind reasons. As far as I am concerned I want nothing to do with such a person and even though I love him for being my big brother, I hate him for being a beast. Ma’am, when you told me you were going to make him learn a lesson, I thought you were sending him off to a jail. And even though I do want to see my brother again and as a changed man, I am not sure it is ever going to be possible. Especially considering that he is such a misogynist and a chauvinistic pig.”

Hearing all this, I had started crying and silently swept away my tears. I wanted to beg forgiveness from both of them for what I had done to them, but I controlled myself and kept mum, waiting for Gauri to respond.

“Aunty, your son has changed and completely become a different person. And he has learnt his lesson and I had actually come here today to discuss his future with you. And Smitha, you will be surprised to know that the male ego is so fickle and with some manipulation and deviousness it can be brought under control and that is exactly what I have done with your brother. Right now, if he was here, I am sure that he would be begging forgiveness from both of you and wanting to be accepted back into your family and striving to be a better brother to you.”

“The main purpose of my visit today is something else altogether. Aunty, with your permission I would like to marry your son, as I have fallen in love with him and would like to be with him for the rest of my life.” Gauri’s words were followed by a pin drop silence in the room and I looked at her with love and gratitude and with joyful tears in my eyes. She held my hand under the table and looked at my mother expectantly. On the other side of the table, my sister was looking like the cat had got her tongue and my mom looked like she had not heard it correctly.

“Wh-whaaat?” was the only word that my mother could manage.

“Since you seem to be shocked with my request, I think I will ask your son himself about this” saying this, she stood from her chair, walked to my side, got down on one knee, and opened a box, revealing a beautiful diamond ring set in platinum.

“Swathi, I love you. I want you to be my partner for the rest of my life. I cannot think of anyone who I love and care for more than you. Will you marry me and be my wife?”

I shouted yes and flew into her arms and kissed her all over the face, not knowing how better to show my love to her. Gauri then placed the ring on my finger and then went back to her place and started eating the food and asked me to explain everything to my dumbfounded mother and sister.

By the end of the happiest night of my life, I had gained back the love of my family and was well into making one of my own. I started visiting my mother often and almost every single night, Gauri would take me out for the cinemas or a dinner or the circus or anything else that caught her whims. Gauri proceeded to remove the chastity permanently and we started making love, in different ways which was beautiful.

One thing remained and always would remain the same though. I was her wife in every sense and I was to take care of the house and submit to her desires and needs at all the times. And even though she gave me all the freedom I wanted and even started treating me as an equal in household decisions, I chose to just let her make all the decisions, as I felt it was not my place to meddle with the thoughts of the breadwinner’s.

There was however one thing that I was very adamant about. I wanted to become a complete woman before we got married. I felt that every that happened till now was meant to be, and that my life now was that of a wife’s and that I never was meant to be a male in the first place. Gauri listened to what I had to say and then told me that she indeed wanted me to be a female but didn’t want to force to become one and hence had not spoken about it till date, and that she was happy that I wanted to become a woman as she was a lesbian and would never have perform me as a man in bed if I had decided to stay as one.

And thus started the transitioning and everything that came with hormonal therapy. My sister had accepted me and began to refer to me as a woman and as her elder sis at all times. Gauri would often take both of us out to shopping and girls night out. It took almost one and a half years for my psychologist to finally clear me for Sexual Reassignment Surgery and now here I am being wheeled into surgery with the love of my life walking beside me, showering me with words of love and assurances about the surgery. As the anesthesia hits my head, the last thought that pops into my mind is that of my upcoming marriage when I would be married off as the bride to my darling Gauri and the future that we are about to embark upon as a happily married couple.

THE END

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The Ramp Queen

hello readers,

for the first time i have written a photo caption. have been meaning to write one for a long time now. let me know what you feel about it

love,
gauri narayanan

The Change Part-2

hello readers,
                     i apologize for the long break i had taken from writing. i had a busload of work to do and exams to write. so i couldn't concentrate on writing at all.
i have written here the second part of the ongoing story "The Change". hope you enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it :)

cheers,
gauri narayanan :)

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I can still remember every single happening of that fateful weekend. I had never had reason to step into a kitchen before then, much less learn cooking. So I was just standing there trying to figure out how to begin making a coffee whilst thinking about how my future is going to shape up to be. That woman had broken me completely and thinking back, I can definitely say that my willpower had deserted me altogether and that at that moment, in that kitchen I felt blank for the first time in my life, as though waiting for someone to order me to do something, a first in my whole adult life.

I came back to my senses and analyzed my current situation. Right now, heeding Gauri’s words was the only thought in my mind and fearing another bout of harassment from her part, I started making some coffee for her. Not having done this before, unsurprisingly my effort turned out to be bad.

“Who would need poison to kill someone? The coffee you made is sufficient to kill even the most resolute of men” she spat the coffee into my face with disdain.

I couldn’t bear it and started crying with my hands on my face and sat down on the floor. She let me cry for some time and then placed a hand on my shoulder and said softly.

“I know that these last 24 hours have been pretty bad for you. I can empathize with you and I know how it must feel to suddenly be in the bottom of the food chain. But your current situation is of your own making and it is my job to make you feel more and more miserable till you realize your lesson. You are just going to have to make peace with it and just look forward to being a good sissy maid for me. I have ordered a few clothes for you to wear while working. And one more thing. ”

She produced a blank bond paper from her handbag and told me to sign it. I hesitated thinking about the complete power it would give her over my life. It must have shown in my face as the very next second she slapped me hard and told me to sign without a moment’s hesitance.

“You have no rights to hesitate you whore. You are my play-toy now and I am not going to stand here and wait for you to go about doing everything at your own pace.”

I signed my initials in all the pages that she showed me and then was ordered to lie down spread eagled on the steel cot. And then I was locked in it with a couple of pairs of handcuffs. She told me that she expected her slaves to be hairless and since I had a lot of it I am going to undergo one of her special treatments to help me devoid of it. She also placed a ball gag on my mouth and whispered “just in case you scream like a little girl” with a wicked smile and left me dreading.

She returned half an hour later with a tin bucket in her hand that was steaming. I could not even imagine what was in it when she started pouring hot wax all over my body. She first started with my torso, then proceeded covering my arms, groin, thighs and finally my legs. The wax wasn’t half bad and felt warm and comfortable to my naked body.  She also covered up the wax with cotton rags and it looked like both adhered well as I could feel the wax pulling at my skin while the cotton was held steadfast in its surface. She left me like this for ten minutes and then when she came back she was naked herself. That was the first time I laid my eyes on her wholly and she was such a structural beauty as well as having a pretty face. My manhood was raging to have a go at her but I could not do anything about it in my confined state.

“Someone seems happy to see me like this. Don’t worry your happiness is not going to last when I start with you.” Saying so, she caught one of the rags covering my upper torso and tagged at it with force. I started screaming into the ball gag as the pain shot up my body and I could feel a thousand daggers piercing through my torso where the wax had been torn off. Through teary eyes I looked down to see that my skin was very red and sore and completely hairless. She then continued tearing away the other rags one by one and didn’t even give me time to scream. Tears were now rolling away freely from my eyes and I noticed that she was un-cuffing me from the posts. Then she lifted me bodily and flipped me on the bed so that my face was rubbing the hard steel. And before I could so much as register the fact that she lifted me effortlessly, she was locking me up again.

Half an hour and a dozen of unheard screams later, even my back was hairless. She then removed the cuffs and lifted me up and walked up to the bathtub in her bedroom and placed me delicately on the hot water filled tub. Initially it was burning but the gentle flow of water massaging my body periodically in different places made me relaxed. She then told me to sit up a little as she was going to join me in the bath.

She slid her feline body into the tub and I could notice her flexed biceps and my mind went back to wondering how she could possibly have lifted me so easily and carried me till here. I was lost in thought when a hand started rubbing lotion on my torso gently. I could see a very different woman in her at that moment and let her rub me up all over. The lotion soothed my body and when I touched myself I could feel how soft and velvety my skin had become.

Then Gauri did something completely unexpected. She came up to me, grabbed my hair and locked her lips into mine and started tonguing me with a vigor. I could do naught but let her control me while she rubbed my chest and pinched my ass. After fifteen minutes of this, she held my head and guided it towards her pussy and ordered me to perform cunnilingus on her. She positioned herself such that my head wouldn’t drown in the tub and then I started licking her pussy and using my tongue to please her orally. I had a raging hard on but she wouldn’t let me touch it and even made me occupy my hands by rubbing her nipples and pinching them. Soon she was releasing load upon load of orgasmic fluids into my mouth and even though I wanted to stop and get the hell out of there, I knew that I will not be able to stop till she ordered me to and thus I continued doing it.

After what felt like 25 minutes, I was told to stop and then made to soap myself and get out of the tub. She threw a towel at me while she dried herself and then told me to come meet her in the bedroom once I had finished drying and applying the moisturizing lotion all over my body. Once I went into the bedroom I was told to dress up with the clothes that were lying on the bed.

I got confused seeing that Gauri was already dressed and all I could find on the bed were women’s clothes. I asked her where the clothes I was supposed to wear were and she told me to look properly in the bed. Not having found any other article of clothing after a thorough search I assumed that she indeed did want me to dress up in her clothes. So I slid up the panties with much haste. The moment the silk hit my skin, a feeling that I had never felt ran through my mind. I could not explain it but the feeling, most different from what I had ever felt till then, made me lightheaded with what I could only guess to be femininity. I ran my fingers up my thighs and over the panties and encountered a bulge that was already straining me from the past one hour’s making out session. I suddenly came in my panties without realizing I had and when I understood what happened I stood there with a sense of happiness and of doom; the former for whatever I had felt till then and the latter for what Gauri would say or do when she found out that I had soiled my panties.

I was lost in thought when she turned me around and slapped me back into reality.

“I SAID, NO PLEASING YOURSELF YOU BLOODY PIECE OF INSUBORDINATE SHIT!!!”

I tried mumbling some excuse and explaining what had indeed happened but my words failed me, like they had, so many times, already that day. She saw the pain in my eyes and relented a bit and I took that pause to explain what happened rather hurriedly. She just started laughing uncontrollably.

“I never thought you’d turn out to be such a sissy bitch. You are going to be a lot easier to dominate than I previously thought” said she between snorts while all I could do was stand in embarrassment with my face reddening more by every passing moment.

I then put on the bra, but try as I might, I still couldn’t get it to hook up in the back. After ten minutes of struggling, a still smiling Gauri took pity on me and hooked it up for me. Then she continued dressing me up. First she slid up the skirt and tied it on the side and then she brought out a pair of silicone breast forms and placed it in the cups of my bra and adjusted it so that they would look natural. Then she made me put on the blouse and buttoned it up herself. She straightened out the dress and then placed a wig over my head. Then she took me to a dresser where she started applying make-up on me.

“Listen carefully now, you are going to be my maid for the unforeseeable future and I expect my maids to be impeccably dressed and to perform their work with perfection. The paper I had you sign is your ownership agreement. According to it, you have agreed to be my slave till the time I see fit to set you free. I have also fired you from your job and explained to your family that you will not be a part of their lives anymore. Your mother was worried about their sustenance but became happy when I offered your younger sister a job with a better salary package than yours. So as of this morning you are my property with no connection whatsoever to the outside world”.

“Today is Sunday. The day you have officially entered into an agreement with me that binds you to me and makes me responsible for your sustenance. However I am, by law, decreed to harass you, humiliate you and abuse you any which way I want. Also I decide what you do and when you do it. You are to serve me wholeheartedly and obey me without any hesitation. You are not to speak until spoken to and you are to always wear women’s clothes that I provide you with. You are to learn how to groom yourself as a woman properly and also you are going to learn how to maintain house properly. You are also to please me and anybody else that I bring, in bed without reservations. The next week I am not going to attend office and instead I will be home teaching you everything you need to know to keep me happy. You are to be very attentive of whatever I teach you. Any lapses of concentration will earn you punishments. And trust me, these two days are just examples of what is to come. So you better be prepared to get punished badly by me. Oh and one more thing. Lift up your skirt, remove your panties and come here to me.”

She then fitted me up with a CB6000 chastity belt, locked it up, kissed my covered up penis and then wore the key in a chain around her neck.

“This is just a measure to ensure that you don’t masturbate when you are supposed to work. It is also a means of controlling your sexual urges. To simply put it, you won’t get hard unless I want you to”.

Then she removed something from her handbag and told me to turn around and bend over. She started rubbing something cold in my butt-crack and then suddenly pushed something inside with force. At the same moment she closed my mouth with her hand and held me tight so that I could neither scream nor wiggle around. This woman’s strength amazed me to no bounds. She was just about 5’5’’ tall and would have weighed just about 55 kgs. I stood just an inch taller than her but I weighed around 70 kgs and had pumped a lot of weights in the gym too. But somehow I was weaker than her and couldn’t do anything about it. She fixed the butt-plug and then coupled it with the belt so that I will not be able to remove it. Then I was told that even my bladder movements were to be controlled by her and any untimely trips to the toilet would be rewarded with punishments.

And then came the icing on the cake, as she was to refer to it so many times in the future.

“Now that you are going to be my slave it is only proper that I name you according to my liking. Prashanth is the name of a guy and you obviously are never going to be one. From this moment onwards you shall answer to the name of Swathi.”

Saying so, she led me to the mirror and that was when I got to look at myself for the first time after I entered her house. I could not believe my eyes. There stood two women in front of the mirror. Two really good looking women. There was no trace of a male anywhere. I didn’t know what to say and was standing dumbstruck in front of the mirror. I kept looking at myself from top to toe and was getting aroused by this feminine creature staring back at me.

I had become something I never thought I would be. For all practical purposes, I was a slave and a woman. I had become Swathi.

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The Change... Part-1

dear readers,

     this is my second attempt at penning a story. some of you may not like the way this part turns out, but it is going to be a roller coaster from the next part onwards. all comments and reviews are welcomed. thanks again for reading my humble offerings.

cheers,

Gauri Narayanan.

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Memories… beating up my younger sister for wearing skirts to college. Scolding my mother for having her hair cut short. Bullying junior girls into submission while at college. Forcing my ex-girlfriend to wear sarees on a daily basis. Memories… they flash past in my mind as I am being wheeled into surgery. What a fool I had been in thinking I could dominate women just to show myself as a superior, as a dominant male in a patriarchal society. When I did understand that it was the women who do run this world, with their devious and subtle and feminine minds, it was too late. By then I had been changed beyond recognition, so much so that I don’t even remember how life before work used to be. And the reason for all this was walking beside the gurney, holding my hands and telling me how brave I am to be doing this. Gauri.

It was 3 years ago when I had walked into her office for an interview. I had been laid off from work and had been unemployed for over a year when I had walked into that interview. I was hoping it would be a male who would be interviewing me. But it was not to be. On previous occasions when I had been interviewed by women I had come off as rather irritable. God! The audacity in those women. Thinking they were superior to me and behaving like bitches, in those office suits and high heeled boots. I would attempt to belittle them through the course of the meeting and finally my ill attitude would cost me the job.

She seemed to be younger than me by a couple of years. At 26 years of age, I was a bit too old to start as a fresher. But my qualifications and my current financial situation forced me to consider taking up a job in a junior role. I walked into the room and went and sat opposite to her after a greeting and a forced smile. She seemed to be a no nonsense person and started interviewing me by asking me to introduce myself. I noticed that she was wearing a saree in a very professional way and I thought it would be easier to get this job as I could easily show my superiority. There was something about this woman though. She seemed to be impervious to my rather sexist remarks and the way I spoke. I could see it in her eyes that she was observing me very closely. And when the introduction was over, she started the technical questioning round. From the word go, the conversation was completely led by her and I just sat there answering her like an obedient school kid. It made me very uncomfortable to be in the presence of this woman. At the end she told me that I had all the necessary qualifications to work with her and that she will be recommending my name to the HRD for selection. After another round of HR interviews where I was let known of the annual income that I could expect and what all benefits that I will be having access to, I was told that I could start work as early as the upcoming week.

The day I joined work I was first called into Gauri’s cabin and was told that she had selected me, not because I had all the necessary qualifications for the job, but for the reason that I seemed to be a person who had the ability to carry out the orders that she’d give. I was baffled by her words and stood there seething in hidden anger. I calmed down and told her that I would like to start with work and would she please tell me my duties. She started listing all my responsibilities and then told me that I would be working in close quarters with her and to that effect she had arranged for a desk for me adjoining her secretary’s. I stood there trying to collect my bearings and thinking about how demeaning it was to be working separate from the rest of the group and how I had been designated a seat beside a lowly female secretary.

The day began with Gauri having me sit in her cabin, opposite her, teaching me everything I needed to know about doing my job. Throughout the day, I noticed how smart she was and how she subtly dominated me. Every moment spent with her was a prick on my male ego and by the end of the day I had finally found a woman who I desperately wanted to dominate, but could never.

The months flew by and I had learned my place in the company and hated it. I was just another secretary for her with a fancy job title. At times I would even be asked to serve beverages when her secretary was away and since our department dealt with the setting up of websites for apparel stores, most of the clients were women. This went on till a point where I wanted to make Gauri feel sorry for controlling me and for treating me, a proud male, in such a way. Thoughts of raping her and avenging myself started surfacing and over a period of time they strengthened my resolve. I started planning it out and fantasized about my triumph after mutilating her honor. I started following her and found out where she lives and what her routine was. I was delighted to find that she lives alone and hardly has any guests and that she stayed at home most of the time, except for when she went for grocery and apparels shopping, which usually took place on Fridays.

My plan was to go to her house on a Saturday evening and force my way and take control of her physically, tie her and then rape her. I had planned to cover up my face so that she doesn’t know who was responsible. I was dreaming about the look on her face when I took her and the way she’d change after that incident.

The fateful weekend arrived and I hung about around her house trying to hide from her view. She was home alone as usual and I by the time the sun started setting I went up to her door and knocked and hid away. The door opened and I jumped at it. Too late, I found that the door was free and that nobody was behind it and I fell hard on the floor. I suddenly felt searing pain in my groin area and felt something tearing away my mask and with teary eyes I looked up to see Gauri standing over me with a mixed look of disgust and elation.

“So, it has finally happened.” Said she whilst aiming another kick at my shins.

I tried to cover myself up and pounce on her when she kicked me on my torso and I could feel my ribs breaking. I was stunned and couldn’t even breathe due to shock and pain. How could a woman, who seemed so light and weak, hit me so painfully? Had I missed something? These were the thoughts that were running in my mind when she tied me up to her bedstead, spread-eagled and gagged. She then cut off all my clothes and stood over me.

“I have been expecting you to act in such a way for a long time, Prashanth. You had no idea did you? I saw you for what you were on that first meeting itself, you male chauvinist pig! I wanted to break you and show you how wrong you were in thinking that you could get away with dominating women. That was the main reason why I recruited you and gave you such a demeaning job. How do you like being my secretary? Have you heard your colleagues speak about you? How they call you my page boy and how they laugh at your pathetic position in the company. It must have been killing your domineering head to be controlled by an apparently weak woman who was three years younger to you and who was smarter and more qualified to be the leader. I still had a lingering doubt and thought you would change over a period of time, but you have not and hence you will be changed forcefully under me.”

Then she went about setting up a video camera on a tripod stand facing the bed, clearly focused on my face and the rest of my nude self. Then she left and I was all alone in the room imagining the worst and trying futilely to untie myself and escape. To my chagrin even the gag wouldn’t come off and it settled even further down my throat almost choking me. I started counting the seconds and with each passing one my dread and the feeling of uncertainty increased. Finally, after what seemed like hours, the door opened and there stood a woman wearing a tight latex blouse and mini skirt with what was clearly a 10 inch dildo strapped on to it. I moaned into my gag and with a pleading look on my face I looked up to see, not a face, but a mask to my astonishment. My heart almost failed at that moment thinking about what was going to happen next.

She turned the recording mode on and then approached me slowly with a feline walk.  Until then I had not noticed what she was holding in her hand. The moment I did, I felt that death would be a better punishment. A horse whip, the likes of which I had only seen in professional BDSM porn, was being caressed by her.

WHIP! WHIP! WHIP!

Had I not been gagged, I am sure that my screams would have woken up the whole neighborhood. She continued to whip me and I could feel my whole body burning with the pain. The torture went on for another ten excruciating minutes. She whipped me with such ease and patience and gave enough time for the impact of the previous lash to settle in fully before whipping me again. I started crying out of pain and shame and once she noticed that her vigor increased and she continued like a possessed woman. Once the torment ended, I was left alone again for another half an hour. By the time it was over and she had come back I wished she hadn’t done so as my body was writhing with pain and I had no control over it. and I had also noticed that even though I had been hit so many times, she had not drawn blood anywhere and that made it all the more painful for me.

She came back with a mug of water and started pouring it all over me and made sure that she wet my whole body completely. At first it seemed very cool and a naïve part of me that she was finally going to let me go and I relaxed a bit. A minute later I was proven wrong yet again. She told me, smiling wickedly, that it was salt water that she had poured over me and then told me to enjoy the pain, covered me up in a blanket and then left. The pain was too much to bear and after struggling against it for some time, I lost my consciousness.

I did not know how long it was before I gained consciousness again. When I opened my eyes, she was sitting in the recliner across me, observing me and then when she noticed that I was awake, she came up to me.

“How does it feel to be tormented by a woman Prashanth? Still have any desire to rape me huh? Oh wait I forgot. You need to be a man to even have such an intent. What you are is a whimpering little son of a bitch who cries even more badly than a woman. And for a man of such high self-regard, you seem to have a teenie weenie. A sissy clit.” Said she, with a cruel laugh.

Her words hurt more than the whole treatment and I broke down completely and started crying and shivering involuntarily. She kept on humiliating me about not being man enough to even have intercourse with a dog and that I deserved to have my penis cut and made to live as a eunuch for the rest of my shameless existence. After about half an hour of harassing me verbally, she told me that it was time for the finale of the night.

She removed the blanket and then spread my legs even further apart and then mounted me. I could feel something very cold against my ass and then searing pain shot through me. She penetrated me again and again with increasing speed until the pain had receded and pleasure of a kind had started seeping through me. At that moment she stopped and then went away, only to return with a bigger strap-on. This continued till she had gone through with every size she had in her arsenal and every time she brought a new one, the pain would keep on increasing. And every time I reached a point where the pleasure began she’d stop and bring in a new one. When the longest night of my life ended, I had been taken In the ass seven times and the final one she used to mutilate me was over 16 inches and when I saw it I couldn’t stop imagining how badly my ass must have been hurt.

The following morning I was woken up with a sharp jab to my face by her heeled foot and was untied from the bed and then told to clean up and present myself before her within 10 minutes. I had lost all my will power and just went about brushing my teeth and taking a dump. I found out to my utter displeasure that I could not sit at all and even the slightest of forces on my ass would trigger a bout of painful shots searing through my spinal cord. She was waiting for me at the door and then led me into the living room where I was pushed into a chair and made to sit in an erect position.

“Listen bitch!” she began in a commanding tone and I quivered with fear and looked up at her with a jerk. 

“Yesterday night was just the beginning.  I will have your full co-operation at all times and to ensure that I have recorded the whole thing in video and have locked it away safely with myself and with a friend of mine. If you do anything to go against my wishes, I will release it to the public and the whole world will see you for the asshole that you are. Understand bitch?”

My voice failed me and I nodded feebly in the affirmative. She gave me a tight slap and said “Always answer me properly bitch. Say yes mistress or no mistress. Understand?”

I summoned up the last of my strength and said “Yes mistress.”

“Very good you pathetic son of a bitch. Your indoctrination into submissiveness began yesterday night and it will not stop until I am convinced that you have learned your lesson. Now go make me a cup of coffee and remember, no funny business. Your balls are in my court now, literally.”

And with a final “yes mistress”, I hurried away to do my bidding, lest she start beating me up again.

                                                       ************************

new facebook page

hi readers,
                   I've added a page in facebook for the blog. please like it be updated on my posts.
http://www.facebook.com/TheGenderGrid
loads of love,
Gauri Narayanan

Just another Crossdressing story... Or is it??? Part-4

Life returned to normal, or so it seemed. I had bought myself a few articles of female clothing and accessories, online, and continued with my crossdressing at my home. Sneha was to return to the office only after a month so she’d call up daily and chat with me for some time. My bosses at the office were happy to have me back and even gave me a very positive appraisal as, my performance during the previous six months had been consistent even though I had been working from home and also taking care of Sneha and Rohit. With this encouragement, I began working with such vigor that I surpassed myself and gave better results for the company.

On the personal front, my life was taking a big hit, as I missed being around Sneha and her son. I started frequenting queer clubs in the city in the hope of warding away the loneliness I felt. Initially I went there as a man and chatted up a few of the people there. Soon we all became good friends and I began meeting up with the crossdressers- Anushka, Uma, Raghavi and Indu- amongst the group for dressing sessions. And once dressed the other girls would always end up having sex. I however did not like it and excused myself from joining them.

 With every passing week my collections started growing and with that my confidence. During one of our meet ups I proposed that we all go dressed up to the pub and have a wild night. The girls all screamed in surprise and happiness as they’d been bugging me to do so for a month. They regularly went out as women and were unperturbed by the reactions they got from the public when out for shopping. I wanted the night to be special and hence I went to one of the city’s biggest shops and began my hunt for the perfect Saree. I told the saleswoman that the saree was for my sister, who was going to be 20 the next day, and that I wanted to surprise her. The saleswoman was of a similar age group as I and started suggesting very fashionable sarees. After an hour long search I finally narrowed it down to two really gorgeous sarees. One was a pink saree with a silver border and was printed with little silver doves all over it and the other one was a blue saree with a dark border and had stripes of a darker shade of blue running through it. I hid my expressions throughout the selection time but something must have given me away as, I was caught by and confessed to the saleswoman of being a crossdresser. She said that she wouldn’t have noticed had it not been for the fact that my eyes betrayed my intentions. She said that I had excellent taste and would make a really pretty girl once dressed up. I blushed and smiled shyly. She said that getting the blouse stitched would be a problem as the tailor might suspect my intentions and hence offered to measure me and gave me the specifications I needed to give the tailor. I thanked her profusely and left the place after paying a hefty sum for the two sarees. I gave the cloth for stitching the blouse and was told to collect it the next evening.

The day dawned brightly and I was in a very happy mood throughout the day. I had taken half a day permission from office and went straight to the nearest unisex saloon from my house. I had my whole body hair waxed, then had a mani-pedi, had my eyebrows threaded ever so slightly, just so that I looked feminine and at the same time people would not notice it when I dressed as a man. Then after having my, now shoulder length, hair permed and conditioned, I had my first facial. I was woken up some hours later and once cleaned I saw that I was glowing and couldn’t have been happier. I gave a very generous tip to the staff and left to get the blouse. Once I came back home, I had a long and hot shower and came out dressed in my newly bought lingerie set. I then went about making up my face. I had decided to understate the make up so that it will look natural with the blue saree. Then I started by giving my face a light foundation cover and then applied mascara in three different shades of blue and then applied chocolate color lip-gloss to end it. Then I wore dangling type earrings and added a single silver chain to my neck and a designer bangle on my left hand and a watch to the right. I also wore a pair of thin anklets and black sandals. I also took a leather clutch and put in some makeup essentials and my id cards. I had let my hair loose and its effect combined with the makeup, accentuated my face and brought out my features in a very pleasing manner. I had never taken so many pains to dress up and was absolutely delighted to find myself looking at a very beautiful and pretty woman in the mirror.

The girls had never seen me as dressed as I was at that moment and I’d always maintained a very androgynous look whenever I was around them. So I was eager to see their reactions when they saw me. I casually went up to the table where they were seated and settled myself at the table immediately beside them. I started staring at them and was waiting for them to realize that it was I, who was sat beside them. For over a quarter of an hour they waited along with me and then finally lost their patience and decided to call me up. When my phone rang, they were startled and I was laughing my ass off at their expressions. They were astounded by my looks to say the least and soon joined me in laughing at their own expense. I was complimented time and again till the night ended and when I bade them goodbye for the night, I impulsively drove my car in the direction of Sneha’s house. I hadn’t seen her in a month and even though she was to join duty the coming Monday, I thought I’d meet her and have a nice chat with her. When I reached her residence it was almost 10.30 pm and I was sure that she’d just be tucking in Rohit for the night. I went up to her door and knocked it, not wanting to disturb the peace of the night with an unpleasant clang. After about a couple of smart raps, she opened the door.

“Who are you? What do you want at this ungodly ho…. Arun?” she asked in astonishment.

“I go by the name of Gauri Miss. Sneha, pleased to meet you again.” I said jestingly.

“Are you even planning on letting me in or am I to spend the rest of my visit standing here and bearing your ogles?”

“C-come in. but how? I mean I know you do dress up but I didn’t expect this.”

“Always expect the unexpected when it comes to me, Sneha.”

“You look absolutely ravishing Arun… sorry, Gauri!”

“Gee thanks Sneha. So tell me what you’ve been up to during this one month? I know we’ve been chatting over the phone daily, but it is a different feel when we both chat face to face. And I’ve missed it sorely this past month.”

“Forget about my life, look at you! I want to know everything that has happened with you this month.” And with that began my narration of the past month’s events. Of course I hid the fact that it was because I missed her, that I began going to the pubs, but apart from that I told her everything and we also talked about her life and what Rohit had been up to in the past month. I confessed that I missed the little devil and how I enjoyed his company during the last half a year. By the end of the conversation both of us were rather teary eyed and checked the time to find out that it was a little past 1 am and Sneha suggested that I stay over for the night and leave in the morning. As it was a Saturday I agreed and then I was given a nightie to wear for the night and I settled down comfortably on the guest bed and went to sleep.

I was disturbed from my sleep and woke up to find that Sneha was lying beside me and cuddling up to me. She seemed to be aroused and knew that I could not talk any sense into her at such a state. I myself was in a dilemma as my heart and mind screamed for me to go for it and the logical part of my brain asked me to restrain myself and stop her advances. I finally decided to hold her close to me and gradually talk to her about it. After some time she began to start sobbing and told me that she wanted to be with me for the rest of her life and asked me, as to whether I could not see it for myself or was I made so blind by the society that I chose to abandon my soul mate for societal acceptance.

I sat up and lifted her up and kissed her fully on the lips. “Does that answer your question Sneha?” I asked after a couple of minutes. She kissed me back with a vigor that I had only seen in feral animals and hugged me so tightly that I was afraid of my neck breaking. I then told her that I was no longer concerned about her holding out the truth from me and that from now onwards all I wanted was to spend the rest of our life together. We lay in each other’s arms reveling in our reunion and talking sweet nothings for the rest of the night.

“It is time to wake up our son and tell him the good news Sneha.” Said I, when the sun had risen.

With tears glistening in her eyes she ran up to me and asked me to repeat what I had said. I told her that she’d heard it right the first time and I loved Rohit as a son and will never see him as someone else’s offspring. Needless to say, the kid was very happy that he was going to have a daddy, although he still insisted on calling me as his mommy. After eating our lunch together, I left to meet my parents and announce to them my decision to marry Sneha. My parents took it in stride and said that they had no problems with our union and didn’t care for what the others thought of it as long as I was happy. I left their place with a promise to bring over their daughter in law and grandson for dinner that night.

My next stop was Sneha’s parents’ residence. I introduced myself and then told them that I was planning to marry their daughter and also become the father to her 4 year old son. They had at first been outraged at the mention of their daughter, but as soon as I told them my wish, they broke down completely and told me that they were very happy and that they had been afraid all along that no one would marry their daughter and that she had ruined her life by having that baby. I then told them about everything that had happened in their daughter’s life ever since they had disowned her. With the exception of my crossdressing, I told them everything that had happened in the last couple of years and how I had finally decided the previous night that I’d marry her and proclaim her son as mine too. They hugged me and told me that they wished to meet Sneha and Rohit as soon as possible. I again made a promise that I’d bring them both over for lunch the next day.

The weekend was extraordinary and both sets of parents liked their child’s spouse to be and began the preparations of our wedding. I made a proclamation that I was engaged to be married and all my friends and family were very happy with it. At the pub, the girls raised the roof with their shouts of happiness and asked me what plans I had for the wedding that was to be held in 3 months’ time. I told them that Sneha and I had decided to have two weddings and two receptions. One for the family and friends who were unaware of my dressing habits and one for those who were privy to it. And I also told them that this second wedding and reception would feature both of us as brides and it was going to be a very private one too and that I’d set aside the day after the wedding for this purpose and had told my family that we’d be going for our honeymoon and instead having our crossdressed wedding.

With the wedding preparations on going, I accompanied Sneha to select all our dresses that we were going to wear for the wedding. We had decided that we’d dress up in similar clothes during our crossdressed wedding and reception. So we searched for the perfect dress for almost a week before we found out what we were going to wear and brought two of a kind, one in pink and one in blue each. It was a beautifully embroidered piece of clothing that stole my heart as soon as I laid my eyes on it.

Our wedding got over without much fanfare as I had made it clear to our parents that we wanted to have a very simple and private wedding. The reception was great and we had a good turnover of friends, family and colleagues. The next day was the one I had been eagerly waiting for. We adorned ourselves in the wedding saree and some ornaments and garlanded each other and kissed to announce that we were married. Then we hung around with my friends who had also turned up in their feminine best. Then we went to freshen up and get ready for the reception. For the reception we had selected a party gown for each other. I wore the pink gown while Sneha wore the blue one. For the reception we had invited all the regulars at my favorite queer club and we again had a gala night with them all.

Throughout our honeymoon I stayed as a woman and we stayed indoors as we explored each other like never before. Now after all these years of marriage and fatherhood and motherhood, as I lay in Sneha’s lap wearing a satin lingerie and baby doll and exhausted after our umpteenth session of love making, I realize how much life changes a person and how love can sometimes bring out the best in a person and how it has brought out the best in me, both as Arun and as Gauri.

                                                                   THE END

Just another Crossdressing story... Or is it??? Part-3

Throughout the next week I had worked out a routine, which involved me dressing up as a woman whenever at home and changing back to male clothes when I wanted to venture outside. Rohit still was not comfortable whenever I wore male clothing, but had accepted that my male self was indeed just a driver who drove him to and from the school and the hospital. Rest of the times I was wearing Sneha’s dresses and remained as a female to make sure that he was happy. Every time I opened her wardrobe, my curiosity would get the better of me and I’d end up trying out different types of clothes. I had a lot of help from the internet and learnt a lot about dressing up in sarees and other dresses. I had also started learning make up skills by watching videos and by the end of the week, had improved beyond recognition. Now I did make a passable woman, if I could say so myself. Meanwhile Sneha was getting stronger by the day, and finally on a fine Monday morning, the doctors deemed that she could be discharged. I dropped off Rohit at his school and then went to pick her up. She was ready and was wearing a simple dress and a beautiful smile. I wheeled her out after paying the charges and helped her into the car and then drove her back home. Most of the bandages had been removed and the only ones remaining were on her limbs. We went in and she complimented me on the way I maintained her place and was really happy that I was there to help her. I brushed it off with a smile and went about setting her up in her bed and then brought her everything she’d need. After preparing lunch, I went to pick up Rohit and when we came back, I led him to the bedroom.

“Look who is back, Rohit.” I said.

With a loud shout of “mommy” he ran towards his mother and hugged her. After sometime she released him and he asked her about the bandages. She convinced him that it was nothing and that she is going to be at home from then onwards. With a leap of joy, Rohit left to play with his dolls. I went about readying lunch and then after feeding ourselves, we started chatting, whilst went about finishing my official work for the day.

With every passing day Sneha got better and better. I, on the other hand, started getting frustrated, as I missed dressing up. Neither could I let it on to her that I had been in her clothes for two extraordinary weeks. To add on to that, Rohit had started asking Sneha about the “other mommy” who had taken care of him when she’d been away. At first she didn’t understand what he was talking about and thought it was common amongst children to imagine such stuff. But he kept repeating it and after almost a fortnight, she confronted me about it. I mumbled something and left saying I had to finish my job. Around this time, my frustrations got the better of me and I started to behave erratically at times. One fine day, my resolve broke and I stealthily entered her room when she was asleep and took a set of her dresses with me. I went to the hall and started dressing up in the saree that I had taken. Just as I was about to swing the pallu over my back, I looked up to find Sneha staring at me, with a sly grin on her face.

“Oh dear, I’ve finally figured out who the “other mommy” is! Was this the way you convinced Rohit to like you.”

“Sneha it is not what you think.” I interjected.

“Really? How do you explain the perfectly clad saree then, Arun?”

“Sneha I had no other choice. You had been taken in for some tests and I was told to expect you back, only after a few hours. I called up Rohit’s teacher and even she wasn’t available. Even the landlady had gone on a trip and I didn’t know anyone else I could trust him with. So I had to do this.” I explained frantically.          

“What about the day care? I’m sure a person with a brain such as yours would’ve contemplated that option. Aha, by the look on your face, you didn’t. So tell me, you do like to wear female clothes.”                                

“Sneha, I would like to confess something to you. I’ve always been a very sensitive person and also had a lot of feminine feelings in me. Ever since I can remember I’ve always wanted to dress up as a woman would, and revel in my femininity. This was probably one of the reasons why I learnt to keep a house. And I swear upon god that I’m straight and sane man who is in touch with his feminine side. And my dressing up in your clothes was an accident. I had no intentions of doing so and had it not been for Rohit’s tantrum, I wouldn’t even be standing here, explaining all this to you.”    

“Had it not been for Rohit, I wouldn’t have found out the true person hidden within the man I love. And don’t worry, I am not mad at you. I just hope that you had come clean with me and told me about it that very day itself. It’d have saved you a lot of frustration.”

“Wh-what? You are not angry at all?”

“No Arun I am not. I fell in love with you because you were so caring and attentive and sensitive and not to mention, cute. It didn’t strike me at that time, but now I can see why you turned out to be such a person.”

And with that she requested me to sleep wearing the saree and then went off to bed herself.

                                                                                *******************

After that fateful night, my life changed for the better and Sneha encouraged me to dress up whenever I wanted to. She checked it up on the internet and told me that I was, what people called, a crossdresser or a cd for short. I was surprised to find out that others existed like me and that at that very moment, thousands of people around the world were dressed up as the opposite sex. Needless to say, I read a lot about it too. Meanwhile, Sneha and I had started talking more and more about girly stuff, as my crossdressing desires had led me to walk through the doors of fashion.

One day, a couple of weeks after Sneha had walked in on me wearing her clothes, she came up to me and told me that I needed a girl name, since I was dressed in her clothes all the time. She said that she couldn’t call me as Arun when I was wearing female clothes and looked like one too. Initially I refused to her proposition, but gradually I started liking the idea and conceded after a couple of days. We discussed a lot of names and finally decided on a name that we both liked.

“I hereby name you Gauri, by the powers vested in me by the almighty Arun!” she pronounced dramatically and then started giggling. I couldn’t help it myself, and started giggling too.

From then onwards both mother and son started referring to me only as Gauri and I loved it that way too. By the end of the third month I had mastered not only dressing and making myself up, but also feminine mannerisms and had practiced endlessly to obtain a feminine range voice. However I had never ventured out as Gauri as I was not confident about myself. Sneha tried convincing me but her efforts went in vain as I refused to budge. And we used to go to the hospital once in every ten days to check her healing progress and the doctors were surprised at her speedy recovery. They praised me of being an excellent caretaker and informed me that Sneha could start with her physiotherapy from that very day itself. They asked me to bring her to the hospital daily for an hour long session in the mornings. Moreover they asked me to help her exercise at home so that she could become mobile sooner.

Her exercise regime began and she slowly started walking without support again. She’d sometimes come to help me out in the kitchen. As I had never liked to be helped with my work, I’d make her sit in one corner and we’d chat about everything under the sun. it was during these chats that I came to understand her completely and felt that her deception was too trivial a thing to give up on her and our future together. However I did not let it on to her as I still was contemplating the alternatives.

Six months flew by and Sneha was hale and healthy and I did not have a reason to stay anymore. So one fine morning, I packed up my bags, without her knowing and then went about doing my work for the day. After lunch I broke the news to her. She did not take it well at all and although she didn’t show her feelings, there was a sort of a pleading look in her eyes. I told her that I had no right to stay in the same house as her any longer and also cited that I needed to join back at the office as a full time employee. Mother and son waved me a teary goodbye when I left and it took me every morsel of mental strength I possessed to drive away.

                                                                                **************